is the new 9/5/17

go-pro is the new self-intimacy

binge-watching is the new all-nighter

every latest app is the new electrical outlet on the brain

police brutality is the new, he said she said

driving is the new multi-tasking experiment

national politics is the new acute intestinal illness

eminent is the new publicity weight

trolling is the new signed, anonymous

stalled in traffic is the new self-introspection

social media is the new can-I-get an Amen

gender bias is the new venereal disease

truth telling is the new video gone viral

black coffee is the new federal witness protection program

free college education is the new

     playground in the neighborhood

handwriting a letter is the new ancient custom revisited

announced victimhood is the new rubber stamp without ink

pro sports apparel is the new identity crisis attire

self-driving Teslas is the new itch to scratch

running a marathon is the new

     intimately staring in the mirror

yoga is the new self-conscious first, slow dance

crying in public is the new outreach program

topic is the new article of clothing imagined as if tried on

weight loss is the new confessional penance

imminent is the new wait

a public proposal ceremony is the new love is everywhere

political figures is the new graffiti in the public restrooms

time spent on line is the new species preening behavior

contract signed is the new distortion of the fine print past

God’s will is the new public honorable impotency stance