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Wednesday, June 19, 2013

A timeless surrender * 6/19/13


So often, when I look in to your eyes, as much as
I am stepping into a rich environment
that is inviting yet it is shielded from the free pass
of all other things entering,
I am both embraced in something greeting me
by fulfillment and held back by questioning myself,
whom of me I sent into your eyes to meet you.
I know little about that part of me
yet it is ever on its way to address you.
You seem to make sense of this entry
and recognition from you comes easy.
I know not who this is who speaks for me there
that you take to heart so readily.
I have given you something I don’t own as me.
I have offered something that is not clearly
or exclusively mine to give, but did.
I am confused by the going forth
but cannot withdraw nor recede.
I am an effort to be as comfortable as you
with what I have sent, not knowing its message
or your amazing ease of acceptance.
I cannot speak for it but mean well.
Allow me to overhear our dialogue within you.
You give a warmth I embrace and yet I hide
my reluctance, based on my worth to myself.
Whatever is happening as me, as us,
is out of my control.
I have only been a messenger of myself to me
and not the truth you see, professed in your presence.
I do not know how that happens.
How the who of me sees to it to honor
the who of you that it meets.
And the overwhelm of response you provide for me
to accept as myself in the exchanges we share
back and forth, are as ever expansive.
There is no gravity in my field.
I am weightless to myself and my heart has a life
I have never seen before now.
So much I am the cast of myself
but never the source or the delight directly.
And now my soul is your light and your soul
is my light going forth in self-discoveries that we share
without questioning or comparison.
I am to the horizon in all directions in your presence.
Somehow as I get out of my way, 
expansion happens in both of us, 
as wonderment feeds discovery.
I have never been so helplessly happy
over nothing of evidence as happening.
I am, by your presence, 
so much more of the offerings 
that come through me to honor your attendance.
The world will never be so foreign
or vacant to me any more.
Your presence has become a perfume of permission
that I willingly give of every moment going forward.
A timeless surrender now guides me
as I am carried in your heart as mine . . .


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