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Tuesday, September 22, 2009

what to make of it

What to make of it

I don’t know what to make

of what I see

I look out

and see myself looking out

I make out things

to be separate

and name them

I could occupy myself

with names and things

but they don’t do that

to themselves

I am not sure

what I see

when I hear things

somehow

I want to separate them

individually

but they don’t do that

to themselves either

I know when I feel

I am confused

and am I feeling myself feel

but calling it something else?

I feel

with different parts of me

some that make contact

with me oddly it seems

and others

that come up

by no means I know

for sure

those feelings don’t to that

to themselves

I feel unnatural

like a new kid at the school

but it is like that

all around me

everywhere

is someplace familiar

to itself

as they are there

before I arrive

and they carry on

without my busy awareness

I am foreign

I do not find myself

a fit anywhere

I like waterfalls up close

and don’t seem to be a bother

or standout

lots of things ignore me

and move to slow

I lack patience or something

I just give them a name

and move on

Rocks are pretty indifferent

to my contact

fish in a tank

get over my tapping quickly

even newspaper print can fade

somewhat in a day

the thing with traffic

is funny

as we all seem so informed

by moving cars around us

I like the way

the ocean ignores me

in that whatever mess I can make

it is quickly forgiven

shoelaces seem really bored

worse than being in a greeting line

at a wedding

I would always drink from a jar

since jars have gone places

and done things

maybe light bulbs are more interesting

than I thought

but I don’t get much from them

when they are not on

everything tells me a story

but won’t let me in

as even gargling with water

doesn’t let me in

the thing with pens is cool

but the mark


is soon dry and rank

jumping is kind of neat

because it is all messed up

and yet everything is fine

right away again

laughing is also like that

but I don’t know how it works

sure the senses sort of whisper

and give like clues

but I have to think in parts

to put it together

and I don’t like that as much

even tables double dare me

to face them

as they are so definite

and indifferent

about what they do

concrete to me as a porridge

is more important than soup

I think words carry

a different kind of germs

I like to be with people

who wish they had wings

because I don’t feel so alone then

but I don’t really like flocks

a vegetable garden

seems so posed and overstated

like it is wearing

a kind of lipstick

for being there

and gloves have an inside out

that to me is odd

I can’t drink water

like a cat or a dog

for I don’t get hardly any at all

for them

it must be magic

why don’t humming birds

get diabetes,

since that red stuff

is all sugar water and dye

I get that the wind

makes trees grow a certain way

but why don’t clothes do that

to the hair on our bodies?

when people use blowers or sweep

why do they stop

where they do

as they could keep sweeping

onward forever it seems

certain things definitely go

in the refrigerator door

but I can’t determine

where my shoulder ends

and my arm begins

or where my neck ends

and my back begins

or a bunch of things like that

I wish I knew how to fall down

instead of then it just happens

how do birds make those colors

in their feathers

as it would be great

if we could do that

with our skin also

I don’t like parties

because people are loud

and abrupt

they seem crazed

and want to be

some place else

but I do like candles

well, at least the flame part

as I wanted to work

like that also

just air, heat

and a blue light

turning orange

what is the difference

between a petting zoo and life?

I would love to see a city

made of kites

where the wind keeps the city

in the sky

and we climb all around

amongst the kites safely

I don’t understand

the average height of a tree

and I don’t exactly know

how numbers work either

I like jumping

with no purpose in mind,

just jumping

I think we are all like clouds

the way they are

as we are visible

and then invisible

and then visible again

I have to wander off for now

as I get tired of my mind

and don’t know

what to make of it

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